Visual Schedules - Helping the Most Difficult Part of Your Day
Dr Jenny responds to a recent survey that asked CMYK’s parents one question…
“What is the most difficult part of your day with your kids?”
Every response we received from our one question parent survey was related to getting children to do something in the moment at a particular time. Parents wanted to know how to manage going to bed or getting out the door in the morning without fits or fuss.
The good news is there is a simple solution that will help to minimize the stress children and parents are feeling, while also helping children manage what needs to be done. The solution is Visual Schedules.
The Gift of Visual Schedules
A major stressor for children is lack of predictability. Our brains seek patterns and predictability to create safety. Transition times such as leaving the house or getting ready for bed can be filled with a lack of predictability for children. Creating a schedule for these transitions will tell your child what is coming next and will soothe the lower centers of their brain. They will feel a sense of control in knowing what is coming next.
Children learn through pictures, so the schedule must include images - even if you don’t believe they are needed. In times of stress, your child’s brain has a hard time accessing what is known. The pictures help them cope with the many changes that come during these transitions and provide safety in what to do next. You may get tired of telling your child what to do, but a picture never does.
Creating visual schedules for their morning routine, bedtime routine, or leaving the house routine will give children the predictability they need to manage the unstructured time in a helpful way.
To create your visual schedules, think of the things you want your child to do each morning to get ready for school, for bed, or leaving the house. Use clip art or take pictures of your child doing each step.
Don’t forget to build in time for connecting rituals. Be sure these connections have eye contact, gentle touch, are present in the moment and a little playful. Something as simple as a special hug or a rhyme that ends with a handshake or a gentle touch will help to soothe the lower centers of the brain and provide comfort. Looking forward to these special moments will help to relieve the stress of having to leave home or go to bed.
Creating a new routine takes time, so be prepared to teach and re-teach. Don’t forget to take a deep breath every time you feel yourself becoming frustrated. You are helping to wire your child’s brain and that can be hard work. As they make a mistake, offer grace and say “Oops, let’s go look at your routine to see what comes next”. Encouragement and consistency is essential while teaching and coaching children through daily routines.
Below are a couple examples of what you could do to create a visual routine for children. Include your kids in the process. They will love being part of creating their visual schedules.
Written by Dr. Jenny Barkac and inspired by the work of Dr. Becky Bailey. For more helpful parenting information go to https://consciousdiscipline.com/about/parents/
Here is a helpful video that will provide more information in getting new tools to support your parenting journey. It is only 32 minutes. Enjoy! https://consciousdiscipline.com/e-learning/webinars/tools-for-your-parenting-tool-box/